US

COMIC RELIEF

US
By US Desk
Fri, 10, 20

The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn’t hear the question....

Corruption

At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. “Isn’t it true,“ he bellowed, “that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?“

The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn’t hear the question.

“Isn’t it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?“ the lawyer repeated. The witness still did not respond.

Finally, the judge leaned over and said, “Sir, please answer the question.“

“Oh,“ the startled witness said, “I thought he was talking to you.“

Top signs you’re bored at work

  • You’ve already read the entire Dilbert page-a-day calendar for 2000.
  • You decide to see how many Mountain Dews you can drink before the inevitable explosion occurs.
  • People come into your office only to borrow pencils from your ceiling.
  • You now require only a single can of cola to belch the names of all seven Dwarfs.
  • The 4th Division of Paperclips has overrun the Pushpin Infantry, and General White-Out has called for reinforcements

Going to be an astronaut

Mother: I think our son is going to be an astronaut.

Father: What makes you think that?

Mother: I spoke to his teacher today. She said he is taking up space.